Growing up in Michigan, I’d often hear my parents complain about how awful the winters were and how they couldn’t wait for them to be over. As a teenager, I’d snarkily reply, “You’re choosing to live here- you could just move,” without appreciating the many complex reasons an adult might be rooted in a particular place.
Nevertheless, even as I matured- and lived in various climate regions before returning to Michigan- I held onto a belief: If I’m going to choose to live here- I should embrace all the seasons and accept what can’t be changed. So even though I don’t enjoy cold temperatures and limited daylight, I try to make the best of winter- even when it lingers.
But this spring— oof! It has been the coldest, grayest, most dismal one I can remember. I cannot wait for summer to start! I am looking forward to this next season more than I have in years.
Part of that looking-forward has taken an intentional shape. Rather than just waiting for summer to arrive, I’ve been eagerly thinking about how I want it to feel — and then working backward to figure out what I’ll need to do to make it feel that way.
My summer, like many folks’, has different segments. Some weeks my kids will be in-town, I’ll be working as normal, and my evenings will open up just enough to allow for a swim at the pool or an extra long walk around the neighborhood. Other weeks will be time on family vacation. And then- most excitingly- there will be times when my kids are away at overnight camp and my husband and I will go away for a few days without them.
Going into any experience with intention makes it more likely we’ll have the kind of experience we’re hoping for. We have the best chance of relaxing if we’ve actually thought about what helps us relax — and what mental state we need to get into to allow it.
If I know that a quiet evening at home can easily get absorbed by screens and chores, I can decide in advance that Tuesday nights are for the pool — full stop. Or take connection: if one of my intentions for a long weekend away is to actually be present with my husband rather than just physically in the same place, I might think ahead about what gets in the way of that for me — and make a small plan. I can turn off notifications on my phone or create an itinerary that’s filled more with leisurely meals than frantic sightseeing. Intention doesn’t guarantee we’ll get what we want but it tips the odds in our favor.
Sometimes intention takes the form of preparing the environment and tools we’ll need. For a little fun anticipation, I’ve started curating a summer reading list (only books that match the vibe I’m going for) and a pool-snacks line-up to go with them:
Summer Reading:
- The Edge of Summer by Viola Shipman
- Big Little Truths by Liane Moriarty
- The Wedding People by Alison Espach
Pool Snacks:
- Frozen grapes
- Salted watermelon with mint
- Fresh Pico de gallo and tortilla chips
While I’ve always been a list-making future-planner, recent research suggests I should keep leaning into that. “Anticipatory savoring” is its own source of wellbeing. When we imagine an upcoming experience we’re looking forward to — a vacation, a delicious meal we’re already planning to order — we generate real positive enjoyment in the present moment. Which means creating my summer reading list and pool snack lineup aren’t just going to make the experience more fun later — they’re adding to my fun right now.
Summer is short — especially here in Michigan, where we earn it. And I think that’s exactly why it’s worth approaching with some care. Not with a packed itinerary or a list of things to optimize, but with a genuine sense of: what do I actually want from this? What would make these months feel, at the end of August, like time well spent?
Wishing you a summer filled with everything you want it to be!
